While we’re on the matter of shameless thievery, Koga Shuko is able to magically assume the bodies of various people thanks to his possession of half of the Double Dragon medallion. At one point one of the brothers beats up a portly man dressed up like a mime ( Double Dragon is not shy about stealing), a man in an AC/DC-style randy schoolboy get up and a dude who looks like Eriq LaSalle in Coming to America in rapid succession. The key difference is that Billy and Jimmy perpetually seem to be squaring off against henchmen all dressed flamboyantly yet randomly in a series of glorified Halloween costumes. The Lees’ battles with various gangs are redolent of The Warriors. Satori martyrs herself to keep the Double Dragon from falling into Koga Shuko’s evil hands, but not before giving half of the medallion to the brothers for safe-keeping. He’s in a furious hurry to retrieve the other half, so he sends his henchmen to retrieve it from Satori (Julia Nickson), the Lee brothers’ guardian and spiritual mentor. The film’s plot finds Koga Shuko in possession of one half of a magical medallion known as The Double Dragon. It’s the kind of shamelessly hammy role that angrily demands that an over-actor cackle lines like, “I just want total domination of one major American city! Is that too much to ask for? Is it? Is it? Huh?” with demented glee. Robert Patrick strides theatrically into this yawning charisma void as Koga Shuko/Victor Guisman, a nefarious businessman with a look that suggests heyday-era Arsenio Hall cos-playing as Max Headroom plus the requisite unflattering facial hair. Individually and collectively, they barely register. Neither is remotely believable as a teenager. Wolf and Dacascos don’t look like brothers. ![]() The problems start with the leads: Scott Wolf, a tiny Jewish TV heartthrob seemingly chosen due to his vague resemblance to Ralph Macchio as teenaged fighting progeny as Billy Lee, and, as his brother Jimmy, Mark Dacascos, a gentleman of Filipino, Spanish, Chinese, Irish and Japanese ancestry seemingly chosen for fighting chops he doesn’t get to show off much here despite this being an action movie. I thought about this a lot during Cannon month, but why, for the love of God, would grown men choose to fight in jeans? Aren’t they a singular combination of constraining and uncomfortable? I mean, sure, Chuck Norris had his own line of action jeans specifically designed to facilitate impactful and stylish kicking but in actuality physical skirmishes in jeans are as aesthetically unappealing to watch as they must be uncomfortable to fight.Īh, but there’s so, so much more wrong with Double Dragon than its unfortunate, almost Jay Leno-level fondness for denim. It’s an even more perplexing look for the goddamn stars of a would-be action movie franchise. It was a terrible look for me as a disgruntled teenager.
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